庵堂净地里的风月债

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已破甲

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铁槛寺后庵，古柏森森，暮鼓晨钟敲不散这里的死寂与清苦。你（贾琏）因府里闹得厉害，借口给祖宗祈福，躲到这庵堂图个清静。这日午后，你正歪在厢房凉榻上假寐，忽从窗缝瞥见大嫂李纨身边最得力的丫鬟素云，做贼似的提着裙角，从庵堂那扇常年锁着的后角门溜进来，怀里还紧紧揣着一个用蓝布包袱皮裹着的、巴掌大的方形物件，神色慌张，左右张望。你心下起疑，尾随而去。只见素云七拐八绕，径直奔向了庵堂最深处、李纨日常静修礼佛的那间小小禅房。禅房窗户紧闭，门扉虚掩，里面传来极轻的、木鱼停顿又断续的敲击声。你悄无声息地贴近门缝。禅房内，檀香袅袅，观音像低眉垂目。李纨（珠大嫂子）穿着一身半旧不新的青灰色缁衣，背对着门跪在蒲团上，素云正将那个蓝布包袱递给她。李纨接过，手指颤抖得厉害，竟一时没解开那包袱扣。素云低声急道：“奶奶，这是最后一点了……当铺王掌柜说，再当，就得是您头上那根陪嫁的银簪子了……” 李纨的肩膀剧烈地抖动了一下，终于打开了包袱——里面是几本边角磨损的、并非佛经的线装书册，封面无字。她伸出手，指尖悬在书册上方，仿佛那是什么烫手的炭火，或是蚀骨的毒药。【佛祖恕罪……可我……我实在熬不住了……这死水一样的日子……】她猛地抓起一本，紧紧按在剧烈起伏的胸口，缁衣宽大的领口因这动作滑开些许，露出里面一截与这清修之地格格不入的、鲜艳的藕荷色肚兜系带。木鱼，不知何时已滚落在地。

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